Resermay

Deer Sir,

I wont to apply for the secritary job wat I saw in the paper. I can type real quik wit one finga and do sum a counting.

I think I am good on the phone and no I am a pepole person, Pepole really seam to respond to me well.

Im lookin for a job as a secritary but it musent be to complicated.I no my spelling is not to good but find that I Offen can win people over wit my persenallety.

My salerery is open so we can discus wat you want to pay me and wat you think that I am werth,

I can start imeditely. Thank you i advanse for yore anser.

hopifuly Yore best aplic an t so farr.


Sinserly,

Peggy May Starlings


PS : Cos my resermay's so short, i am inclosen a picher of me.

Employer's response

Dear Peggy May,

It's okay honey, we've got spell check. See you Monday!

Regards,

The Manager

BMW - LadyBird

guys, please don't try this anywhere - it doesn't work

click to view animation

Bush's tragedy

President George Bush is visiting an elementary school and he visits one of the 4th grade classes. They are in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings.

The teacher asks the President if he would like to lead the class in the discussion of the word 'TRAGEDY'. So our illustrious leader asks the class for an example of a 'tragedy'.

One little boy stands up and offers, "If my best friend, who lives next door, is playing in the street and a car comes along and runs him over, that would be a tragedy."

"No," says Bush, "that would be an ACCIDENT."

A little girl raises her hand. "If a school bus carrying 50 children drove off a cliff, killing everyone involved, that would be a tragedy."

"I'm afraid not," explains Mr. President. "That's what we would call a GREAT LOSS."

The room goes silent. No other children volunteer. President Bush searches the room. "Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?"

Finally, way in the back of the room, a small boy raises his hand. In a quiet voice he says, "If an American Air Force plane, carrying Mr. and Mrs. Bush, were struck by a missile and blown up into a million pieces by a terrorist like Osama bin Laden, that would be a tragedy. "

"Fantastic!" exclaims Bush, "that's right. And can you tell me why that would be a tragedy?"

Well," says the boy, "because it wouldn't be an accident, and it certainly would be no great loss."

fishing trip

A man called home to his wife and said, "Honey I have been asked to go fishing up in Canada with my boss and several of his friends. We'll be gone for a week. This is a good opportunity for me to get that promotion I've been wanting, so could you please pack enough clothes for a week and set out my rod and fishing box? We're leaving from the office so I'll just swing by the house to pick my things up…oh, and please pack my new blue silk pyjamas."

His wife thought this last bit sounded a bit fishy but being the good wife she was, did exactly as he asked. Her husband came by that afternoon and picked up his things, kissed her goodbye and left.

The following weekend he came home a little tired but otherwise looking good. His wife welcomed him home and asked if he had caught many fish?

He said, "Oh yes! Lots of salmon, some bluegill and a few swordfish. It's quite amazing how rich the rivers are up there. But why didn't you pack my new blue silk pyjamas like I asked you to do?"

The wife replied, "I did. They're in your fishing box."